When I teach on my Yoga Retreats I often get many interesting questions from my sweet retreat guests. The one I often get is this: Are you in a relationship?
The answer to this is: No, I am not. I am single.
Not because I have made a choice to be single and live my life alone. I think life is much more meaningful when you share it with another person.
The other question I always get is this: Why is a woman like you still single?
That is a good question. I consider myself being a warm, open and light human being. I like the simple things in life. At times I enjoy luxury and I will go far to find the best food on my plate. I do not have a long list of how a man should be. I do not believe in lists of how a man should look like. I want a man who knows how to be a man, someone who is strong mentally and not afraid of love and commitment. And here is the problem!
In my single years, I only seem to experience a world full of people who are afraid to settle down, commit and be happy with one person. It is sad to see how many confused people are running around like restless dogs in search for love. If you happen to experience the same, be aware and be strong! There are a lot of “ding dong” men out there. I am sure there are a lot of “ding dong” women too!
What do I mean about “ding dong”? “Ding dong” is a man who will keep coming back to you when he doesn’t have anything better. A “ding dong” man is a man who enjoys living like a flying butterfly. He might be super serious with you for a while and then he suddenly disappears or tells you a bad excuse like “I need a break” or “time is not right”. Of course that is all nonsense because he will continue to fly around and have fun with other women. However, he will still try to leave a door open at your end. He will still try to contact you. That is a “ding dong” man. He keeps contacting you when it suits him, but he will never tell you what he wants.
I myself met a great man a while ago, and I was clear and honest about what I wanted and how I felt. Until now, he has not told me what he wants but he keeps playing the same “ding dong”-game. Such a man is useless. And unfortunately there are too many of such “ding dong” men in the world.
A “ding dong” man is a confused man who doesn’t seem to grow up. He likes to fool around but deep down he is unhappy. A “ding dong” man will try to get in contact with you again and again, and the message he sends you on whatsapp or email is nothing but an empty message like:
“Hey, how are you?” Or “Hey, hope you are well” or “ What are you doing?” or “You are an amazing woman” or “Good morning” or some other “ding dong” useless message.
He hopes you will reply, because when you reply his male Ego will be filled up. But don’t be fooled. He will send the same message to other women, just to see if they reply to him. This is the “ding dong” man, and this is junk love!
Junk-love people will write “hey baby”-messages to you and still fool around with other women. Junk-love people will do anything not to lose contact with you, write you messages to keep some kind of contact, but it is all a game of fake love. They will never tell you what they want, because they don’t know what they want. If a man really wants you he will not play games with your heart. He would hold your hand right now, and you would be the only one for him. He would not need to fly around to look for something better, he would not need to fool around like a teenager. He would respect you, and he would look you in the eyes and tell you exactly what he wants.
If a man cannot be honest and tell you what he wants, he is not a man. A real man is not afraid to communicate. A real man is not afraid to open his heart. A real man will tell you honestly what he wants, and if he tells you he wants to live a single-junk-love-butterfly-love-life, at least he tells you the truth. A least this makes him a man, because he has been honest with you and openly told you what he wants. If a man cannot tell you what he wants but keeps playing his “ding dong” game, he is trash. And who wants trash in life?
There is so much junk love in the world, just like junk food! People fumble around in the dark, playing games and behaving without any respect for themselves or others. Keep living in a junk-love-world and you will end up miserable and empty. Just like junk food makes you feel sad and empty. You can keep filling yourself up with empty calories, but you know that you will end up feeling low. Junk love and “ding dong” men have the exact same affect on your body. My advice – Stay away from it!
Don’t waste your health with junk love. If someone can’t be clear on what they want then let this be a sign to you – it is a “ding dong” man or a “ding dong” woman. A “ding dong” person only looks for attention. They are obsessed with attention from the other part because this fills up their empty heart and soul. They are obsessed with flirting around, they are obsessed with sexual attention, and they have fallen into their own trap of junk-love. They fall in love easy, but run away quickly. They find new flesh every 3-4 months. They keep searching, and searching, and don’t see the good quality they have in front of them. Instead they run away, and they keep searching for “something better”, they keep looking for new flesh, but soon the “ding dong” man wakes up to reality. He sees that what he is doing is bad and that his life has turned into a very lonely road.
Stay away from “ding dong” people unless you are a “ding dong” person yourself and you enjoy such a life. If you respect yourself and your own body, you don’t need junk-love or “ding dong” people in your life. Junk love is dead love. I don’t want junk-love in my life, because it is not going to make me happier or healthier.
Live healthy always, be clear on what you want, be honest, and don’t waste time. Life is short and one day you realize you have wasted precious time on empty junk love and “ding dong” people!
Don’t be afraid to be alone. It is much better and healthier for your heart and soul to be alone than letting yourself fall into the trap of “ding dong” people or junk-love relationships!